Saturday, 26 March 2011

I hate myself!

I really hate myself
I hate myself for keep screwing up making silly mistakes
I hate myself for not saying the right words
I hate myself for being so socially awkward
I hate myself when I'm being horribly judgemental
I hate myself for being heavily teary-eyed
I hate myself for always hurting myself a lot
I hate myself for not being the right person
And trust me the list goes on
I just hate myself for hating so much of me.

Ergo, I went for a quest
searching for someone
who would love me more than I could ever love myself
cheer me up through thick and thin
and through that someone
I would eventually learn to love myself.

I looked everywhere high and low
I searched for days and months and years
I almost lose hope for it
Until one day, I found that someone.
It took me a long time to realise that that someone has been there all this while
That someone showed true compassion
Taught me patience and endurance
Calm and gentle to me
And above all showed me love
That someone is Allah.

For He is the only one capable of making me happy
For He is the only one always there to comfort my sorrow
For He is the only one out there always protecting me
For He is the only one capable of healing my wounds
And above all, for He is the One who loves me more than I love myself

Praise be to the Most Merciful for all these blessings
For this life, this family, these friends, this love
There is nothing more I could ask for
His love is sufficient enough
Thank you Allah!

I love you Allah.
I really do.


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